Last week I posted a little insight into my woes & frustrations. I wanted to thank each of you that took the time to respond with positive feedback and support. Your words provided comfort and perspective, allowing me to come to terms with the change in direction my training has taken.
I do not want to give up running. I haven't lost my passion. I absolutely love running. I look forward to every opportunity I have to get out there and pound the pavement for an hour or so. I just don't have the desire to go for 3+ hour runs in the cold of winter. I know - I'm probably a wimp. Yet there are demands upon me - granted these are demands I have put in place myself - but they are expectations and goals that are more important in the long run than whether or not I qualify to run Boston.
My children are young. I homeschool. I want to provide the best possible education I can for them. I want to be there when they read their first words. Multiply fractions. Overcome frustrations and ultimatley reach their goals.
It is not that my goal to run more marathons... to hopefully qualify... is not important. But until the kiddos are self-sufficient - the time required to put in the training is difficult. Not impossible, but difficult.
I want to show my children that you can achieve anything if you set your mind to it. If you desire it strongly enough. Yet at the same time, I also want to show them that there is a time and a place. That we occasionally need to make sacrifices. That we don't have to push ourselves ALL the time. We can also take time to relax. To just be.
So - I am not giving up on running. I am just going to put off the longer distances until they are older. I may still run a 30K or a marathon this year - but during a time of the year when training in freezing temperatures isn't necessary. When the kiddos can accompany me on their bikes. When I can rise before my family for my long runs and yet not require a head-lamp to light my way.
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OSN: 400m warm-up; 8 x 25m backstroke drill (on the 5th, I torqued my left shoulder); 6 x 25m freestyle sprint w/fins; 20 minutes of --> 150m freestyle, 100m IM, 50m choice (breast). As I finished the 50m, Coach Bob took a seat on the starting block. I remarked to him, "I did exactly what you warned us NOT to do during the backstroke drill." He inquired about where the pain was exactly and then advised me to get out. "Sit in the sauna and take it easy," he suggested.
As I am planning/hoping to swim on Saturday (1 hour postal) - I took his words to heart and followed suit. Tonight, I'm icing and took 400mg ibuprofen.
You will look back on this time and be grateful that you had the presence of mind to make this decision. Time passes far too quickly. If you care for yourself, you will still be able to run marathons for many more years. Your kids are only young once, and the time you are putting in now pays dividends for a lifetime. Go you.
ReplyDeleteWhen you have your fingers on the thread of your life, these kinds of things work themselves out, almost magically :-)
ReplyDeletegreat post..it is hard to balance everything sometimes :)
ReplyDeleteYour new focus seems completely reasonable. Boston certainly isn't going anywhere - chase it down again when you can devote more effort to it without feeling guilty.
ReplyDeleteGreat post... There cant be a better reason than the one you have.
ReplyDeleteMakita, know that you are not alone in your struggles. And that we all stand behind you with whatever decision you make!
ReplyDeleteOK, NOT wanting to run 3+ hours in the cold does NOT make you a wimp!!
ReplyDelete;)
Good plan - you have so much time ahead of you to run, but that time with the kids, whoa, it goes by too fast. Enjoy it and savor it now, run the other stuff when the time is right.
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